The Journal Session That Changed My Life

I don’t know if you’ve ever experienced this or not, but I have, and I want to tell you about this one thing that has helped me feel happier at home as a mom.

If you’re new to me, I’m a life coach for people who want to feel better for good and I’ll tell you why I’m qualified to help people feel better and then I’ll tell you about this one thing that you need to make sure you have in your life if you want to feel better.

The reason I’m so good at helping people feel better is because for so long, I didn’t feel good.

I know exactly what it’s like to be so consumed with anxiety that it feels like you don’t have control over your body.

I know what it’s like to desperately want to feel better.

I know what it’s like when someone tells you that happiness is a choice and how it feels like something is wrong with you that you can’t figure out how to choose it.

But when I found coaching, my entire life changed, and I’m not just saying that because I’m a certified life coach.

My entire life literally changed. Not overnight—but it changed deeply. I’m always telling my clients: your life didn’t become a mess in a day and we’re not cleaning it up in a day.

It is a process that happens over time with support.

But I was able to go from feeling stuck in bed and dragging myself up only because my kids needed to get out of their cribs and be fed…

To waking up at least an hour before anyone else and having my mindset-coffee-alone time and feeling prepared and optimistic for the day.

When I get up and I take care of me first, I want to embrace my day. I want to be there for my kids. I am in charge of my life. I make the time to workout after they go to school. I eat healthier. I feel so much happier.

And all of this is, I believe, because of one small journal session I did early on when I found coaching, and I’m going to tell you about it.

I’ve talked about this before, so if you’ve been following me for a while, you’ll remember this story.

But one day, about 10 years ago, I had a journal session where I wrote about my dream life.

I was so tired of complaining to my journal everyday about how much I didn’t like my life that I decided to write about what I DID want.

I didn’t care if it would never actually happen, I just wanted to write about something that felt good. I wanted to dream.

If you want to feel better, pay attention because this is something you can do for your life, and it works.

Writing about your dream life can seem daunting or ambiguous, but I am a very practical person, so I wrote about my dream day.

I didn’t concern myself with where I lived or what my house was like. I focused on ME and how I spent my time.

I didn’t have time stamps. I didn’t start with, “I’d wake up at 5am.” Instead, I simply wrote about how I wanted to wake up and what I’d do if that time was mine.

So much of the time I felt like my time wasn’t mine. I was constantly interrupted by my kids. I felt like I couldn’t do anything I wanted to do and this made me feel frustrated and guilty because I felt like my kids were a problem and I didn’t want them to be a problem. I wanted to love them, but if you don’t feel love, you can’t give love.

So I wrote about what my day would be like if some miracle happened and my day played out exactly as I wanted it to.

I started writing from when I woke up and I didn’t stop until I wrote myself crawling back into bed at the end of a very satisfying day.

Now. What didn’t happen was that the next day I immediately started following that vision.

No. What happened is that after I finished, I actually felt despair. I felt like there was no way I could have that. It felt so out of reach.

It was like there was this deep ravine that I couldn’t cross and I was on one side and my dream was on the other side. I didn’t know how to bridge the gap. I didn’t know how to get myself over to the other experience.

I thought the only way I could have that life was if I could get up at 4:30am and I knew that would never happen.

I wanted to cry. I wanted to throw a fit like a toddler and be in the unfairness of life.

But I didn’t, and to this day I believe it’s a miracle.

Because I heard a little whisper of a voice.

This little voice said, “Yeah, but what if?”

What if you could? What if it did work? What if you didn’t have to get up at 4:30? What if 6 was early enough?

Because the truth was, most days I was awake at 6, I just wasn’t getting up. I had no reason to. I didn’t want to do anything that might wake my kids.

And so with that whisper of hope, the next day I tried it, and my mind was completely blown.

I was showered and dressed before my kids woke up and it was so amazing because it changed everything at breakfast.

I was there to put the food on the table and to clean up, so I didn’t have to deal with cleaning up a big mess. And then, I wasn’t sneaking off to shower because it was already done. I didn’t have to deal with kids crying and banging on the bathroom door.

I had so much energy that when my kids went down for naps I could actually do something fun just for me.

I couldn’t believe I’d never had this experience before. I couldn’t believe I’d never tried it. I couldn’t believe it was so simple. So doable. So life changing.

It was a miracle.

All because I decided.

I decided to take a chance, to dream.

To believe in possibility.

It was a pivotal moment in my life. It was strong enough for me to never go back to my old ways.

Yes there were still days when I chose to sleep in, but they were no longer the standard.

So I want to offer this to you.

Have a powerful journal session. It could change your life, literally.

Write about your dream life, realistically.

Realistically meaning you have your same circumstances. If you have kids at home, you’ll still have them in your dream life.

Whatever your responsibilities are, you still have them.

But if you desired to have them, if everything went your way, what would that be like?

Writing this out is giving yourself a vision for your life. When you have a vision, you have something you can live into.

If you don’t have a vision for your life, your brain will just keep repeating what it’s repeating.

Give it something new to think about. Create a new possibility for you to live into that feels enticing.

If you do this, I would love to hear how it goes for you. Feel free to email hello@marindatervo.com and share or ask for help. 

I truly believe that if you can think it, you can live it. You wouldn’t have the dream if you didn’t also have the capabilities to fulfill it.

My job it to help you realize it.

I hope this was inspiring and that you also go have a powerful journal session. It just might be what you need to change your life.